You need to know that I love everything that Celebration Freedom Ministries stands for, so on many occasions I have tried to volunteer to help. I have been told no on each occasion. Mainly, because there fearful leader knows I have a lot going on and wanted to protect me from another obligation. I volunteered to work with the children and was told no. I volunteered to serve food and was told no. I volunteered to sell books and was told no.
At our Fuse 56 retreat this fall one of our leaders who sings with CF said "Hey!, You should come and sing with us. We need a soprano." I smiled and said that would be great! I love to sing. I sang in the show choir in High School, Performed in community theater and even went to college with a vocal scholarship. Singing comes natural to me, except that for the last 10 years I have sang in front of children. I was still willing to join a few friends and sing praises to the Father. I could not join them right away because I was going to be out of town for a few weeks but promised to help out when I returned.
About 2 weeks ago, I decided to show up for a practice. Only to find that there was no practice that night. There was going to be a solo singer. No big deal. I told them to just let me know the next time they needed me. Ring, ring went my phone one night, I was asked to come and sing for a Friday night conference they were having. Sure thing! I would love to help!
I arrived at 5pm to practice. When I entered the room I looked at the stage and saw a guitar and one microphone. I thought to myself, maybe everyone else had plans and they decided to let the leader of the group just sing. I was mentally prepared to just stay and enjoy the conference and whomever was to sing. Here is the scary part... much to my dismay, the guitar was for the guitar player and the microphone was for me. oh yes! that is correct! They wanted me to sing, solo. I thought it was a joke at first, but I quickly realized it was no joke.
I was terrified and it was absolutely terrible. I only did one song and I am surprised that I lived through it. First of all, I sing for kids, not adults! Secondly, I am used to tracks. Many of them have some kind of vocals on them. Third, It has been a long time since I have had to figure out when to come in on a song while being accompanied by guitar. I can tell you truly, it was not my best work!
Finally, the agony was over and I could return to my seat. Praise the Lord, that I find my identity in Christ! I am a child of God and he loves me even when I mess up. I began to think back to a time in my life when that same scenario of being put on the spot and then totally ruining a song would have crushed me. You see, I would have accepted all the things that Satan was tried to put into my head. "You're not good enough, you're not talented, who are you to even try to sing?" That is what Satan says. However, God says "You are a child of God, free in Christ, any noise of rejoicing to my name is acceptable."
Philippians 4:4 (NIV)
4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
Don't believe the lies that Satan tries to tell you this week! Remember, you are a child of God and Jesus loves you!
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